DIFFICULT: needing much effort or skill to accomplish, deal with or understand

There is a quote by Gandhi (brought to my attention in the book previously mentioned…”Find Your Truth”) “Ever worthy act is difficult.  Ascent is always difficult. Descent is easy and often slippery.” How applicable to the life of many who are attempting to find their place…rehabilitate from an addiction..or do both simultaneously. I am simply trying to figure out life as a servant and the word DIFFICULT popped up at me.  I’m in this place in my journey where DIFFICULT is a daily presence….almost a friend at this point. I wake up…check my phone and wait for that thing that will present itself as my daily hill to climb.

I sound like I’m writing a sob story…I’m not…I’ve been able to open my arms wide and embrace the task at hand. Folded hands in prayer has helped also….because I’m learning that without those words to my Creator’s ears DIFFICULT seems too….ummmmm….DIFFICULT.

I’m being so rude…I haven’t even really defined the word for you..I apologize. Here is the meaning…shout out to Australian Siri for this morning’s definition. DIFFICULT – needing much effort or skill to accomplish, deal with or understand.

As I’ve pursued volunteer work with homeless youth and adults I’ve second guessed my value and doubted my skill sets for this new endeavor.  I know my end goal and I am aware of the steps…but I trip over my self-doubt and stumble on feeling inadequate. I’ll put the work in and I’ll be diligent (ahhhh….another previous word). This week I’ll work towards figuring out WHAT exactly I’m trying to accomplish. My hope is that this will help the journey be less…well….DIFFICULT.

What has helped me to continue moving forward and overcome the tougher part of the journey has been community and finding value in the shared experiences of missionaries…leaders…people who have already progressed in their own community work and from those with similar passions and goals as myself. I respect the fact that they’ve paved the way and made some mistakes that I now get to avoid. I’m not..however…dumb enough to think I won’t run into my own difficulties.

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What's a blog? Who are these people reading these things? I'm about to find out I guess... I just need a place to purge the thoughts in my head as I pursue a life of complete SERVITUDE to ministry and to the world. You're welcome to come watch me fumble along.

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