I have a confession to make….please don’t judge me. I’ve typed and re-typed this and have decided to forge ahead with this public declaration. I….am a Real Housewives addict. I’m hanging my head in disgust…but how glamorous is that world of BMW’s and perfect hair and seemingly endless amounts of money? What would my life look like on camera? Would the world find me fancy and fascinating? Sometimes I replay my days or weeks like an episode in my head…to see if IIIIIIII’MMMMMM at least interested in what I do with my time. Would I watch myself and cringe…or approve?
If the camera were on me now..you’d cringe at what you see. The time is 11:50 a.m. and I’m uncombed, not bathed and I can taste last night’s tortilla chip binge still. My one solace is that it’s still technically before noon…therefore it’s morning…and I’m still within that time frame of it being acceptable for me to be this disgusting.
Had I been under scrutiny of a camera a couple of hours ago, at 9 a.m. you would have caught me in earlier stages of unkempt-ness…contemplating my word of the day…ADAPT. I looked up the definition and… according to my laptop search engine… adapt means to make something useful for a new situation. Seeeeee!….I may resemble Pig Pen more than a glitzy housewife but I WAS working on something deep and kind of glam. (Is contemplating glam?)
About 9:30 a.m. I realized that ADAPT is a great word to go with SERVITUDE because I’ll need to actively work on change so I can be useful to a community of people I aspire to help. The next half hour of glamorous mulling was about how to begin to the process of becoming useful for this new situation. What strengths do I already possess to go out and minister and what weaknesses do I need to seek mentoring and guidance for?
Seeing the need for some more excitement in my day I got up to do what I always do when I need to clear my head from it’s deep thoughts…I cranked up my Missy Elliott and danced…I suppose this is where viewers would learn to appreciate me a little…in these moments of spontaneous dance. Pajamas make wonderful hip hop clothes and unstyled hair is the new funky. If neither of these claims are true…please don’t tell me…I like my world of fantasy. ADAPT….ADAPT…ADAPT…..it ran through my head while I performed…errr….danced in my living room. ADAPT!
I don’t know where 10:15 a.m. – 11:50 a.m. went. Eggs were made…emails were answered…a few people needing places to volunteer were helped and I had to find some resources for an 18 year old homeless youth. It’s all pink champagne and elegance over here and the day is just beginning.
If you’ll excuse me…I must go prepare for a posh day of errands..event planning and figuring out how to ADAPT. If this were truly my episode of Real Housewives you’d get to see me post shower…fab outfit on…and an afternoon of lunching..munching…gossiping and working. I can tell you that 12 p.m. – 5 p.m. will most likely see me putting on one of my cleanest white or gray t-shirt…lunching and munching on avocado toast…a second tortilla chip binge and a trip to the rescue mission. Oh this life of elegance I lead…..